finding my museum

Adoptees often have scarce information about their origins and carry an ever-present, ambiguous grief. I know I have. In an attempt to fill part of this loss, I visited a series of museums that held artifacts linked to my Chinese heritage and recorded what I saw through drawings. Drawings in this book are from the China Institute of America, The Metropolitan Museum of Art, the Museum of Chinese in America, and the National Bonsai and Penjing Museum. Click images to enlarge.

Much of what I observed offered a view of an old China, shown through a blurry, Americanized lens—not the present-day China I might have experienced had I grown up there. The most relatable exhibition was at the Museum of Chinese in America, a space dedicated to telling the story of discrimination and subjugation Chinese immigrants have faced since the early 1800s, as well as celebrating their contributions to every aspect of American society, from the Civil War to contemporary pop culture. In the future, I aim to connect with my background more personally and deeply.

This search was inspired by Vladimir Nabokov’s 1938 short story A Visit To The Museum, in which the main character is asked to locate and return a portrait of a friend’s grandfather in a French museum, but somehow finds themselves in their homeland, Russia.